exclusive

O.K. So... I am most definitely in a relationship with my dear Bob now... or as I like to call him "Bad Bob" (nephew of the legendary Bad Bob of the fabled Land of Adventure). 'Twould be happy indeed if it weren't for those pesky loose ends.

It is hard to move on from Evan. He meant/means a great deal to me. I am not sure I am making the "right" decision. Maybe I am giving up too easily. We were getting along so well. But... I love Bob... I am in love with Bob... and it is nice to finally find a man who is in love with me. He is quite the spicy piece of man chicken to boot. It is hard, but necessary, methinks to let go of the past. Otherwise there will never be any progress.

There are other loose ends... other people miffed or worse with me. There are regrets. There are people I need to tiptoe around and people I am quite convinced would rather I were unhappy again. And I am not quite sure how to proceed in these areas. But I am sure with time these issues, like all issues, will be resolved or forgotten about.

And then of course there is the age difference, I am a few years the elder of said Bob. I don't notice much in our private speakings and interactions but the maturity difference does make itself apparent from time to time in group settings. Besides that I just feel badly... like I might be destroying him somehow.

But really these are things not to be complained about. There is indeed stress, but it is mostly of the good kind. Happiness... insomuch as it can be obtained... has been obtained for me.